Wednesday, August 29, 2007

I Don't Ask For Much

But Glenn Geffner calling a pivotal Yankee series?

Did Obie have heart surgery? What the hell?

Any way, I was scouting the 2010 RS in Portland Maine last night (don't expect much, they all look like midgets) and turned the game on in the 7th inning.

Tek hit a home run to tie the game.

Geffner's call was horrible. He hears footsteps. He didn't want to commit to a home run call until about 5 seconds later when the ump twirled his fingers.

And then, I coughed up my hot dog:

Glenn says [about Damon]: "He barely just missed the ball"

Speak English you honk. If you "barely just miss the ball", that should mean that you caught it.
Not in Glenn's world.

What the hell does "barely just missed the ball" mean?

Then, later in the inning, Glenn, the company whore, who can't speak ill about anybody, says that somebody "hit the ball on the..."

He hesitates. He won't say "screws", because that would sound a little saucy. Instead, he pauses and says, "hit the ball on the fat part of the bat". You know he thought "screws", but didn't want Dr. Charles Steinberg crawling up his ass, so he cleaned it up.

I can't handle this.



Chone said...

Word economy, Glenn Geffner style - "It's a tie game, and the line scores are identical for both teams. 2 hits 2 runs for the Red Sox, and 2 hits 2 runs for the Yankees." Yes Glenn, they are the same. This is what identical means.

Anonymous said...

Lou, I've enjoyed this blog immensely but I must admit I've never heard the term 'hit the ball on the screws' and I've been watching baseball games for years. In fact I've never heard a single baseball announcer utter those words.

I guess I'm the idiot, not Geffner.